Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime. Give a kid a fish, it's gonna die. Have a story ready.

  • All generalizations are false, including this one.

  • Love thy neighbor, but make sure her husband is away first.

  • Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.

  • Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are attractive to the opposite sex.

  • INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

  • Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships.

  • Did you hear about the fat, alcoholic transvestite - All he wanted to do was eat, drink and be Mary.

  • All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

  • I got a sweater for Christmas... I wanted a screamer or a moaner.

First time doing yoga