Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
The greatest enemy of man is alcohol, but the bible tells us to love thy enemy...... I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!!
Men are always whining about how we are suffocating them. Personally, I think that if you can hear them whining, you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow.
Woman are like Prawns. Their heads are full of shit, but their pink parts are quite awesome.
What are the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I'm home.
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.... what more can I say........
Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.
Why is it that men can react to broken bones as 'just a sprain' and deep wounds as 'just a scratch', but when they get the sniffles they are deathly ill 'with the flu' and have to be bed-ridden for weeks?