Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • To truly love another, you must first love yourself. And it wouldn't kill you to wash your hands in between either.

  • If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

  • Some mornings I wake up grumpy, other mornings I just let her sleep!

  • There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing; just show me somebody naked.'

  • You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

  • Light travels faster than sound. This why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

  • College is like a woman: You work so hard to get in, and nine months later, you wish you had not come.

  • If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is to stop digging.

  • If you can't get a lawyer who knows the law, get one who knows the judge.

  • If your feet smell and your nose runs, you're built upside down.



Best senior quotes ever