Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • I have such poor vision I can date anybody.

  • The income tax has made more liars out of people than golf has.

  • But the early bird still has to eat worms.

  • You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

  • Definition of pressure:.....A wife, a mistress and a mortgage all a month late.

  • Love means never having to say, "Does that twenty include the spanking?"

  • Food has replaced sex in my life .. now I can't even get into my own pants!

  • You have two choices in life: you can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.

  • Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

  • A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

First time doing yoga