The most enjoyable form of sex education is the Braille method.
You have two choices in life: you can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.
If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.
I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away... so does having no medical insurance.
A little bit of love goes a long way in our lives. It can provide us with higher highs and lower lows. But, if it comes with a persistent burning sensation, see your physician.
I married my wife for her looks ... but not the ones she's been giving me lately!
Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, I could be eating a slow learner.
Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?
If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.