The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
Flashlight: a case for holding dead batteries.
Life isn't like a box of chocolates... it's more like an order of Indian food. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow."
Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away... so does having no medical insurance.
How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.
The face is familiar but I can't quite remember my name...
I was born intelligent - education ruined me.