I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
It's better to have Loved and Lost than to live with an asshole the rest of your life!
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.
I was born intelligent - education ruined me.
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children".
No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.
I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.