Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said, "Listen it and die."

  • Practice makes perfect..... But nobody's perfect...... so why practice?

  • Is it possible to be totally partial?

  • There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing; just show me somebody naked.'

  • My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading.

  • When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

  • Taxation WITH representation ain't much fun either.

  • Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

  • Your future depends on your dreams, So go to sleep!

  • When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to look like a nail.

Wet feet

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