Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

  • Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm broken by a swan.

  • 'Work fascinates me', I can look at it for hours.

  • Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

  • There are two kinds of pedestrians- the quick and the dead.

  • God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.

  • Definition of pressure:.....A wife, a mistress and a mortgage all a month late.

  • If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague

  • If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that.

  • Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.

Wet feet

Some animals dislike getting their feet wet.