Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

  • Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

  • Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime. Give a kid a fish, it's gonna die. Have a story ready.

  • And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on Me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan.'

  • What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'

  • A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

  • A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

  • Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.

  • My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects.

  • When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other.

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