Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • See, the problem is that God gives man a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

  • What are the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I'm home.

  • In the '60s people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

  • Men are always whining about how we are suffocating them. Personally, I think that if you can hear them whining, you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow.

  • All generalizations are false, including this one.

  • If at first you don't succeed shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to?

  • Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.

  • You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

  • If the world was a logical place, men would ride horses sidesaddle.

  • What three words will kill a mans ego? 'Is it in?'

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