Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.
Why is it that all of the instruments seeking intelligent life in the Universe are pointed away from Earth?
A paranoid is someone who knows a little of what's going on.
Finally, my ship came in ... and as expected, it's leaking.
Have you ever considered how evil a chicken omelette is? They kill the chicken, chop it up and cook it inside their own babies... Too bad it\'s delicious.
Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
I'm not into working out. My philosophy is no pain, no pain.
A flat will occur when you are without a spare. This will happen after your significant other has reminded you to get one. He/She will be in the car.
Tell me what you need and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.