Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming----wow----what a ride!!

  • The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

  • I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a Great White or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.

  • A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.

  • A flat will occur when you are without a spare. This will happen after your significant other has reminded you to get one. He/She will be in the car.

  • My Grandfather is eighty and still doesn't need glasses...He drinks straight out of the bottle.

  • I'm not weird... weird is Chinese slippers and break-dance pants!

  • Marriage is an institution... but who wants to live in an institution?

  • What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

  • It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

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