Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.

Failure is not an option. It's bundled with your software.

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Finally 21, and Legally Able to Do Everything I've Been doing since 15

Things you'll never hear a woman say: 'My, what an attractive scrotum!'

I love animals - They taste great!

NASA reports that galaxies are speeding away from earth at 90,000 miles a second. What do you suppose they know that we don't?

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?

I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.