Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.

  • Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your clothes would they eventually just disappear?

  • Our last fight was my fault: My wife asked me 'What's on the TV?' I said, 'Dust!'

  • God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.

  • If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

  • I'm not weird... weird is Chinese slippers and break-dance pants!

  • Fine day for a good workout. Let's steal something heavy.

  • Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

  • Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"

  • Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Happy Hour

50c drafts Monday through Friday - until someone pees. Would hate to be that guy.