Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa.

Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn

There are two kinds of pedestrians- the quick and the dead.

I can see clearly now, the brain is gone...

I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong ...

Light travels faster than sound. This why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings ...... they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

Some people are like Slinkies. . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.