Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press "Ctrl-Alt -Delete " and start all over?

  • A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.

  • Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.

  • I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

  • It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

  • Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children".

  • The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

  • This job is only a test had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, bonuses and promotions.

  • When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

  • The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.



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