Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press "Ctrl-Alt -Delete " and start all over?
A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.
Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children".
The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
This job is only a test had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, bonuses and promotions.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.