A bad day of fishing is still better than a good day of work..!!!
If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
I've decided that to raise my grades, I must lower my standards.
Love is grand; divorce is quite a few more grand.
They say a smile is a gift, which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient. But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant.
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Men are always whining about how we are suffocating them. Personally, I think that if you can hear them whining, you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow.
Light travels faster than sound. This why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!