I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I've ever known.
No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her crap.
We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like?
Never trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
I started out with nothing and still have most of it left!
Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
Toilet stolen from police station. Cops have nothing to go on.
If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.