What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?

I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

'Hard work never killed anybody', but why take the risk...

Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

People who don't drive, slam car doors too hard.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex I woke up to find himself next to a really ugly woman. That's when I realised I had made it home safely.

My cousin just died. He was only 19. He got stung by a bee - the natural enemy of a tightrope walker.