The light at the end of the tunnel is the normally the headlight of the oncoming train.
What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?
My wife says I never listen to her...at least I think that's what she said.
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.
My weight is perfect for my height - which varies.
The income tax has made more liars out of people than golf has.
I'm glad I'm not bisexual. I couldn't stand being rejected by men as well as women.
If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.