Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood specifically to stir paint with.

  • They told me I was gullible... and I believed them.

  • Woman are like Prawns. Their heads are full of shit, but their pink parts are quite awesome.

  • If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague

  • Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.

  • Everything of importance has been said before by somebody who did not discover it.

  • Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

  • The income tax has made more liars out of people than golf has.

  • Marriage is a matter of give and take, but so far I haven't been able to find anybody who'll take what I have to give.

  • The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

Meanwhile in Ukraine

A police office in Ukraine pulls over a drunk motorist in a bath tub