A flat will occur when you are without a spare. This will happen after your significant other has reminded you to get one. He/She will be in the car.
A bad day of fishing is still better than a good day of work..!!!
I'm so depressed. My doctor refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building.
Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It!
A paranoid is someone who knows a little of what's going on.
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?
Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
College is like a woman: You work so hard to get in, and nine months later, you wish you had not come.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.