Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, 'Well, that's not going to happen.'

  • A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.

  • Why is it that all of the instruments seeking intelligent life in the Universe are pointed away from Earth?

  • I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it!

  • When kleptomania gets really bad, just take something for it.

  • No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.

  • I married my wife for her looks ... but not the ones she's been giving me lately!

  • The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

  • Joint Checking Account: a handly little device which permits my wife to beat me to the draw.

  • I am the same today as I was tomorrow.

Parking in small spaces

A woman show that if there a will there's a way - no matter how tight the parking space is