Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

Welcome To Shit Creek ~ Sorry, We're Out of Paddles!

My wife says I never listen to her...at least I think that's what she said.

I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.

It's not an optical illusion. It just looks like one.

No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.

It's better to have Loved and Lost than to live with an asshole the rest of your life!

There's two theories about arguing with a woman. Neither one works.