By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I've ever known.

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like?

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....

A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

You have two choices in life: you can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.

I'm a freelance gynaecologist

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.