My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading.

Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.

The more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know So.. why learn.

Always look on the negative side, so you'll never be dissapointed.

"Buffet". A French word that means "Get up & get it yourself!"

If you can't get a lawyer who knows the law, get one who knows the judge.

If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money costs less.

Love is grand; divorce is quite a few more grand.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.... what more can I say........