
People: Africa's scratching posts!
What are the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I'm home.
If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that.
If At First You Don't Succeed... Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.
When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
Every morning is the dawn of a new error...
Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?
'Work fascinates me', I can look at it for hours.
Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm broken by a swan.
I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a Great White or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.
I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.

People: Africa's scratching posts!