Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • Brain cells come, and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

  • There's two theories about arguing with a woman. Neither one works.

  • Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

  • God created cats so that men could learn to understand women.

  • Cat: The Other White Meat

  • Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway !

  • Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings ...... they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

  • Some people are like Slinkies. . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

  • The wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise.

  • I don't do drugs anymore 'cause I find I get the same effect just standing up really fast.



A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dog along for company. One day the dog starts chasing butterflies and before long he discovers that he is lost. So, wandering about he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having lunch.

The dog thinks, “Boyo, I’m in deep doo doo now.” (He was an Irish setter)…. Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.

Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dog exclaims loudly, “Man, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here?” Hearing this the leopard halts his attack in mid stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees. “Whew”, says the leopard. “That was close. That dog nearly had me.”

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes. But the dog saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The cat is furious at being made a fool of and says, “Here monkey, hop on my back and see what’s going to happen to that conniving canine.”

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