
There are 3 kinds of men in the world:
Some remain single & make wonders happen.
Some have girlfriends & see wonders happen.
The rest get married & wonder what happened?
Love thy neighbor, but make sure her husband is away first.
I just new I was in big trouble at work when the new policy on sexual harassment included a photo of me.
If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
It's Been Lovely But I Have To Scream Now!
You can't respect a man who carries a dog.
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
Build a fire for a man, and keep him warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire and keep him warm for the rest of his life.
If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.

There are 3 kinds of men in the world:
Some remain single & make wonders happen.
Some have girlfriends & see wonders happen.
The rest get married & wonder what happened?