Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

  • Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

  • No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.

  • Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are attractive to the opposite sex.

  • I always leave an empty milk carton in the refrigerator just in case someone wants their coffee black.

  • It's better to have Loved and Lost than to live with an asshole the rest of your life!

  • Remember, half the people you know are below average.

  • Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

  • I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.

  • Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.



Make a girl laugh

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