Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • If a man speaks in the forest, and no woman hears him, is he still wrong?

  • The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

  • A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.

  • We cannot see the future. We cannot change the past. We can only live in the now with an eye towards gaining enough power in the future to wreak revenge on the son-of-a-bitch who screwed us in the past.

  • I married my wife for her looks ... but not the ones she's been giving me lately!

  • Is it possible to be totally partial?

  • No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.

  • Always take time to stop and smell the roses... and sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee.

  • Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

  • Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.



Sara Swing

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