Random Thought
“When something good happens, you drink in order to celebrate, when something bad happens, you drink in order to forget, and when nothing happens, you drink in order to make something happen!”

Another Thought...

PostHeaderIcon A little male bashing!

Why do men become smarter during sex?

-Because they’re plugged into a genius.

Why don’t women blink during foreplay?

-They don’t have time.

Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?

-They won’t stop for directions.

Why did God put men on earth?

-Because a vibrator can’t mow the lawn.

Why don’t women have men’s brains?

-Because they don’t have penises to put them in.

What do electric trains and breasts have in common?

-They’re intended for children, but it’s the men who usually end up playing with them.

Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?

-Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock.

Why do men masturbate?

-It’s sex with someone they love.

Why were men given larger brains than dogs?

-So they won’t hump women’s legs at cocktail parties.

Why did God make men before women?

-You need a rough draft before you can make a final copy.

Why is a man’s pee yellow and his sperm white?

-So he can tell if he’s coming or going.

How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?

-Nobody knows – it hasn’t happened yet.

There are 2 rules for success in life.

Rule #1: Never tell anyone everything you know.

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