Joke Overflow –  Joke Archive

Random Thoughts

  • The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, But also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

  • How come when you first pull the drapery cord the drapes always move the wrong way?

  • The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.

  • Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

  • Isn't it funny how the mood can be ruined so quickly by just one busted condom.

  • But the early bird still has to eat worms.

  • If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague

  • A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.

  • If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

  • When kleptomania gets really bad, just take something for it.



A man was leaving a convenience store with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 Feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking single file.
The man couldn’t stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said:

“I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I’ve never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?”

“My wife’s.”

”What happened to her?”
“She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her.”

He inquired further, “But who is in the second hearse?”

The man answered, “My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her.”

A very poignant and touching moment of brotherhood and silence passed between the two men.

“Can I borrow the dog?”

The man replied, “Get in line.”


A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 Feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking single file...