Random Thought
“Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.”

Another Thought...

PostHeaderIcon Why it’s better to be a man!

  1. Virtually all nudity on tv is feminine

  2. You know a lot a bout weapons of massdestruction

  3. When you go away for five days, you only need one suitcase

  4. The queue for the toilet is always at least 80% shorter

  5. You can open bottles and jars all by yourself

  6. Old friends won’t say: “Gee, you have become fatter, haven’t you?”

  7. You don’t have to save up to go to the hairdresser

  8. When you’re zapping you don’t have to stop for every talkshow

  9. When you have a job interview they aren’t looking at your ass all the time

  10. All your orgasms are real

  11. A beerbelly doesn’t have to be a problem in a relationship

  12. You can go to the toilet on your own

  13. An average phonecall takes you 30 seconds

  14. When they are questioning your work, you don’t have to burst into tears and say: “everybody hates me!”

  15. You can kill your food without hesitation

  16. The garage is YOURS

  17. No one expects you to be galant or caring

  18. Nobody wonders if you swallow

  19. You never have to clean the toiletbowl

  20. You can shower and get dressed in ten minutes

  21. When having sex you don’t have to worry about your reputation

  22. If someone forgets to invite you to a party, you don’t have to fight over it

  23. Your underwear is VERY cheap. And comes in packs of three

  24. None of your colleagues will get you into tears

  25. Aerobicstournaments

  26. You don’t have to shave below the neck

  27. At night you don’t have to feel a hairy bum in your bed

  28. If you’re 34 and still single, nobody really worries about it

  29. You can join a long-distance peeing contest

  30. You never have to put on make-up

  31. You can become president

  32. Flowers are handy to make up

  33. You can spend 98% of the time thinking about sex

  34. You don’t have to worry about your white t-shirt getting wet

  35. One pair of shoes is more than enough

  36. Wherever you are, you can always eat a banana

  37. You can say whatever you want

  38. Foreplay is an option

  39. Who? Ricky Martin?

  40. If they tell a joke, nobody stops when you enter the room

  41. You never have the urge to prevent a drunken friend from having sex

  42. You understand what the carmechanic tells you

  43. It doesn’t matter when nobody notices you have been to the hairdresser

  44. The world is a big toilet

  45. When you’re wearing a t-shirt you can still jump

  46. You never have to shave your legs

  47. No problems when you go to a selfservice gasstation

  48. You have at least twenty ways to open a beerbottle

  49. Whatever you’re wearing you can always sit with your legs spread

  50. Same job, higher pay

  51. Grey hair and wrinkels give you more authority

  52. You don’t have to leave the room to scratch your crotch

  53. Buy Weddingdress: $5000,–. Rent weddingsuit: $50,–.

  54. With semen at a time, in theory you can double the world’s population with only 15 orgasms

  55. The remote is yours

  56. Nobody looks at your tits when they talk with you

  57. When you visit somebody, you don’t expect you to bring a present

  58. No worries at the chemist when you go buy condoms

  59. You don’t have to say “I am going to freshen up” when you go for a crap

  60. When you forget to call back a friend, he won’t say that you have changed

  61. One day you’ll become a dirty old man

  62. You ARE able to find a football match on tv

  63. If at a party someone is wearing the same clothes you wear, it will probably become a friend for life

  64. When you burp, it’s already expected

  65. You’ll never have to cancel on a good down dirty night of sex because you have a headache

  66. You don’t ever have to wear high heels

  67. Pornflicks are made with you in mind

  68. You don’t have to remember everyone’s birthday

  69. You don’t have to like someone to have sex with them

  70. Your friends will never try to trap you by saying “notice anything different about me?”

  71. You can talk about music with your friends

  72. Sportsbars

  73. Nobody minds, especially yourself, if you wear your clothes three days in a row

  74. You can slam a nail into a wall

  75. Others really are impressed when you can cook, or better still when you can iron your own shirts

  76. A washingmachine will stay a mistery all your life

  77. You don’t give a sh*t about what other people think of you

  78. The sound of a Ferrari is better than sex

  79. “So what” if you look shitty once and a while

  80. You don’t get the uncontrollable urge to clean the house when someone comes over for a visit

  81. Barmanagers put the most beautiful girls behind the bar

  82. You know how to aim and actually hit something when you throw a stone

  83. You know how to play pool (and darts and cards)

  84. You save a humongous amount of money on beautyproducts

  85. You can park a car

  86. You have a sense of humour

  87. You like beer

  88. The records you bought 20 years ago are still considered great music

  89. You can act like a complete fool when you’re with friends

  90. There is absolutely no need to know the difference between color and fine washables

  91. You cannot get pregnant

  92. Most beautiful men are gay

  93. It’s perfectly legal to call the referee a dumb piece of shit

  94. You never have any problem with getting along with your sister

  95. You know how to operate the videorecorder

  96. You can write your name in the snow

  97. When you buy clothes a size too large you can perfectly wear them

  98. It is socially accepted to visit prostitutes

  99. Older women don’t fancy you

  100. You’re allowed to spit on the floor

  101. A simple car brochure gives you months of reading pleasure

Comments are closed.