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“If a man speaks in the forest, and no woman hears him, is he still wrong?”

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PostHeaderIcon 2000 Olympics comittee questions!

The 2000 Olympics committee set up a website to deal with queries from would be spectators. These are genuine queries- plus the answers that were posted on the site for all to see..

Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)

(Upwards, out of the ground, like the person who asked this question, whothemselves will need watering if their IQ drops any lower…)

Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)

(Depends on how much beer you’ve consumed…)

Which direction should I drive – Perth to Darwin or Darwin to Perth – to avoid driving with the sun in my eyes? (Germany)

(Excellent question, considering that the Olympics are being held in Sydney.)

I want to walk from Perth to Sydney – can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)

(Sure, it’s only seven thousand miles, so you’ll need to have started about a year and a half ago to get there in time for this October…)

Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)

(And accomplish what?)

It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed porpoise. (Italy)

(I’m not touching this one…)

My client wants to take a steel pooper-scooper into Australia. Will you let her in? (South Africa)

(Why? We do have toilet paper here…)

Are there any ATMs in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane,

Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)

Where can I learn underwater welding in Australia? (Portugal)

Do the camels in Australia have one hump or two? (UK)

Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)

(Why bother? Use your fingers like the rest of us…)

Do you have perfume in Australia? (France)

(No. Everybody stinks.)

Do tents exist in Australia? (Germany)

(Yes, but only in sporting supply stores, peoples’ garages, and most national parks…)

Can I wear high heels in Australia? (UK)

(This HAS to have been asked by a blonde…)

Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)

(Yes. At Christmas.)

Can I drive to the Great Barrier Reef? (Germany)

(Sure, if your vehicle is amphibious.)

Are there killer bees in Australia? (Germany)

(Not yet, but we’ll see what we can do when you get here.)

Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)

(What’s this guy smoking, and where do I get some?)

Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)

(Another blonde?)

Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)

(I love this one…there are no rattlesnakes in Australia)

Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)

(Face North and you should be about right)

Can you send me the Vienna Boys’ Choir schedule? (USA)

(Americans have long had considerable trouble distinguishing between Austria and Australia.)

I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name.

It’s a kind of bear and lives in trees (USA……where else…)

Are there places in Australia where you can make love outdoors? (Italy)

(Yes. Outdoors)

Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)

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