INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings ...... they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

Failure is not an option. It's bundled with your software.

Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa.

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?

Remember, half the people you know are below average.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.